Accelerating my receding hairline...

If someone can explain to me what a "Horzanta Pasitian" is, it would help me mark these damn labs. This particular example is not the result of a language barrier, it's the level of spelling that can get you through a Regina high school these days.

Destiny...

I thought my bus was at 7:00PM. Turns out it was there at 6:56 and I missed it. That kind of pissed me off because I was tired and hungry but whatever, it was my bad. I hopped onto the 7:26 bus, just me and two cute girls. I sat about 5 seats behind them. I watched them cuddle and neck with each other the whole way home.... It was my destiny.

Lucky Louie

For those of you haven't had the good fortune of stumbling across this great HBO sitcom, it comes with my highest recommendation. Think "Everybody Loves Raymond", but with a hell of a lot of swears and vulgar sexual language. Ah, my kind of show. Here's a link to a bit torrent of the entire first season:

http://isohunt.com/download/13489059/lucky+louie

Halloween Howler

Well the pub crawl was a success/complete failure. On the one hand, I had a blast as Sherrif RumpRanger. On the other hand, I puked on the bus and woke up on the floor of my bathroom. The verdict? Let's do it again! Yeeeehaw!

Blake isn't in the picture. He had a pretty good Roman costume. Toga! Toga!

I may or may not have been violated...

Living on my own at the prime age of 23, I figured that the only middle aged woman handling my underwear would be a cougar that I picked up at Bart's. It turns out that if you arrive in the laundry room one minute after your laundry has finished drying, you are privileged enough to witness a 45 year old woman pulling your undies out off the dryer and carelessly throwing them on a table in the middle of the room. How am I supposed to sleep at night knowing that there's a chance that she smelled every pair as she pulled them out? Or maybe she took a pair for herself, something to keep under the pillow for lonely nights.... I better take inventory.

OoooOOOoooooh! Halloween!

Are y'all lookin forward to halloween? I hadn't put much thought into a costume, but tonight I decided that I wanted to wear my cowboy hat. A quick trip to Value Village later and you've got Sherrif Jasper, at your service. Let's see how many people can slam me without making reference to Broke Back Mountain :) Here, I'll start you off:

Oh Blair, you make such a wonderful Woody!

Here are some pics from last year. This was one of the fanciest costumes I've ever had, we all made the turtle shells out of wire from coat hangers and paper mache.

John, I respectfully disagree

Apparently Ethan Albright, a lineman for the Washington Redskins, took exception to his player rating in Madden 2007. Here is an excerpt (Yes, I know it's probably a fake, but it's pretty damn funny if you pretend it's not):

It’s also pretty wonderful that my awareness rating was 59. You make it sound like I wake up in the morning, helplessly shit and piss myself, then lose three of my teeth before I discover that I am trying to eat a rock for breakfast. Fuck, John, I understand you saying that I am slow and lacking athleticism, but a rating like this pretty much labels me as retarded. Rod “He Hate Me” Smart has a 52 in this category. Electronic Arts is saying that seven rating points separate me and the breathing embodiment of the perfect oxymoron. Rod Smart struggled to arrange words in sentence form. Cave men had better hold of the English language. The only actions that separate point values of ignorance at this embarrassing level are things like using your own toothbrush to wipe your ass. I basically edged out Rod by my lack of shit teeth. If I take a night school class, could you bump me up to a 60?

Couldn't have said it better myself...

"Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus's-flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition."
-- Jack Handey

Fear the stingrays!

It seems as though the delicate truce shared by man and stingray for generations has been broken. Folks, this is war.

MIAMI, Florida (Reuters) -- A leaping stingray stabbed an 81-year-old Florida boater in the chest, authorities said Wednesday, leaving its poisonous stinger lodged close to his heart in an incident recalling the one that killed Australian TV naturalist Steve Irwin last month.

Fire Department officials in Lighthouse Point, about 30 miles north of Miami, said James Bertakis was in a small recreational boat with two grandchildren Tuesday when the spotted eagle ray leaped aboard and struck him.

On Roughriders!

Great win by the Riders last night! With the Evil Empire officially eliminated from the playoffs today, it's time to get focused on Calgary for the Western Semis. Stick it to Burri$!!

Whatcott

Regina's own Bill Whatcott made the Daily Show a while back. You may remember Bill as the guy who posts anti-homosexuality fliers on your car in the parking lots, or maybe as the guy who brings giant posters of aborted babies to the university.I hope they portray him fairly...

The Future is Here...Now

MIT has developed what I consider to be THE coolest drawing board to date. It's a completely interactive digital drawing board that brings your drawings to life. Maybe we can trade our useless empty shell of a lab building for one of these bad boys.

http://www.thatvideosite.com/video/3406

Cyanide and Happiness

For more G-rated comics, check out http://www.explosm.net/. Some of my favourites include:

• http://www.explosm.net/comics/8
• http://www.explosm.net/comics/138/
• http://www.explosm.net/comics/156/
  

The scientists out there may enjoy this one: http://www.explosm.net/comics/266/

My Apartment

Not everyone has had a chance to see my apartment yet. If you are in this group (and not currently living in South Korea...) then I suggest you head on over sometime.

My fairly boring entrance way.

Nice kitchen, eh? Many experiments have already taken place here. I called the first one "rice".

Aaah, student life

For the days that I feel like just wearing chaps

My cozy living room. Never eeeeeever will I buy from the brick again.

My kitchen table. I designed and built it from scratch myself. So many of you had such little faith in me! Benefit of having an entire table surface made of floor tiles - I sweep my table after supper. Booo ya!

Ooooh, tile-y!

Aaah, my baby. 30" wide screen complete with a top notch surround system. Yeah, I spoiled myself but I've made good use of it. It's nice that my apartment walls are made of cement, I can watch movies at deafening levels.

There's a nice divider between the living room and my kitchen. Just on the other side of that wall is a stack of empties. It's like...an empties shield.

My throne!

Look, my bathroom is colour-coordinated!

My closet, complete with guitar easy-reference posters

I wired some speakers all the way from my living room so that the Barry White goes wherever I go...

My whole apartment seems to have some kind of brown theme.

So there you have it...I think I'm spoiled for a grad student, but the suffering begins now when I can no longer afford to eat.

My first hello

Hey Everyone (of course, "everyone" probably pertains to my mom...)

Don't expect to see me spill my guts on here, I mostly just want to use this as a way of relaying quirky stories and puzzling things that I come across on the net. My first order of business will be to post pics of my apartment for those of you who haven't had a chance to come see it yourself yet (bastards!)

Anyhow, hope you enjoy