I may or may not have been violated...

Living on my own at the prime age of 23, I figured that the only middle aged woman handling my underwear would be a cougar that I picked up at Bart's. It turns out that if you arrive in the laundry room one minute after your laundry has finished drying, you are privileged enough to witness a 45 year old woman pulling your undies out off the dryer and carelessly throwing them on a table in the middle of the room. How am I supposed to sleep at night knowing that there's a chance that she smelled every pair as she pulled them out? Or maybe she took a pair for herself, something to keep under the pillow for lonely nights.... I better take inventory.